The stastical results were not so suprising, but the comments were.

I called this case study “What a b*tch!* and based in on a couple of experiences from my life and my pickup experience.

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Situation:

You are in a popular bar/pub type establishment on a weekday night with two of your friends/wings (from Japan Lair?). You’ve hung out with these guys for some months now, done some daygame, had drinks, etc. You help each other out. You consider them good friends. One of them opens a group of three lively university-age girls and personally bring them over to the table to join you and the other guy. He chooses his target, clearly the prize of the three girls (cute face, slamming body), and you and the other guy pair off with the other two girls, who are both very nice and respectably cute girls.

You’re going OK with the girl you’re talking to, though it’s nothing special. You could take it or leave it. You notice that the girl with your buddy, a sassy young thing with a super cute face and tight body, is wearing a very bitchy expression, and you listen in. No matter what your buddy says she’s acting like he’s hitting on her. He’s trying his best and being a perfectly decent guy, but she’s giving him a hard time, making fun of him, talking about how foreigners are all playboys. It’s clearly phasing him a bit and they’re interaction seems to be turning into a real combative vibe. What did he do to deserve this? He opened them, he’s a cool guy, and so are his friends.

But you can’t get over the fact that… she’s hot! She’s really your type because [insert your biggest turn-on here].

After about 20 minutes of chatting with your respective girls and a little cross-table chitchat, your friend who opened the set lookPs very irritated, arms crossed, looking around the room. The hot girl is checking herself in a hand mirror.

So you suggest to your friend “should we get going?” and he says “yeah! let’s get out of here!” You ask him “did you get the number?” and he says “fsck no!” Your buddy is antsy to leave, move on to the next place, and find himself a nicer girl.

You got your girl’s number and you’re 50/50 on if you’d ever meet her again.

Everyone stands up from the table and your buddy has his jacket on and wants to go to the next bar.

But regarding this bitchy yet undeniably hot girl…
What are you going to do?

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Pickup theory often espouses the almighty “bros before hos” theory in which you always stand up for your friends. But does Japan Lair agree with this?

Yet comments almost all sided with the girl, and proved quite interesting:

“Honestly, it’s almost always the guy’s fault, having guts doesn’t substitute for experience or a shaky ego and he’s usually just in over his head,” wrote one member.

“He couldn’t get her. He should step up his game and learn from that experience,” commented another.

Also siding with the upset girl was this member:
“girls aren’t bitches for the sake of being bitches. If they’re being a bitch it’s usually because they don’t like the guy OR they’re trying to shit-test him, or more likely they’re shit-testing him, he’s taking it personally and getting upset, they lose attraction, and become even more bitchy because now he’s just another dude wasting their time.”

The Japan Lair poll results, however, told a different story.

(1) Ignore the bitchy girl or politely say goodbye. Even though she’s your type, bros before hos – she disrespected your buddy, and now he wants to go. – 9 votes (34.6%)
(2) Ask her why she’s being such a bitch to your friend, and tell her what a great guy he is. See if you can help them work out their issues. – 3 votes (11.5%)
(3) Ask your buddy if you can hit on the hot bitchy girl, then hit on her if he says OK. Let everyone else wait, including your irritated buddy. – 9 votes (34.6%)
(4) Just hit on her. Your buddy wasn’t getting anywhere. Everyone else can wait. This is a golden opportunity for you and these chances don’t come often. – 4 votes (15.4%)
(5) Other – 1 vote (3.8%)

For the record, I am a very strong advocate of supporting your bros and I think some girls are just nasty for the sake of being nasty. They deserve to be left alone, are not worthy of your effort. You deserve a respectful girl. Unless my friend did something very wrong, I will side with him.

I guess I am a bro for life.

Japan Lair has been through this topic many times. Here are a few tips to get your approach machine working.

1. Get free talk – Talk to information desk girls, store clerks, call your friend, just get your mouth in motion because it’ll be easier then to transition into entering someone’s world uninvited and chatting them up.

2. Smile, even if it’s too much - Japanese people smile and smile and smile. If you’re selling something, it’s necessary. Yet most Westerners have the culture of smiling when something is funny or trying to be nice. Put a smile on your face, and walk around with it. It’ll pick up your mood and make you more approachable and less threatening.

3. Throw the first 2, 3, even 5 away. - Give yourself permission to absolutely bomb your first approaches. It takes a while to get your chat on. Just ask a girl for the time and then bail. Make a comment and bail if you feel any discomfort. Don’t worry, no one’s keeping track. Merely by breaking into someone else’s world, you’ll feel your adrenalin start to rise and feel more comfortable with it. Just throw away those first few and don’t look back. (Of course, if they go well… keep talking!)

4. Hello – It’s the only word you may ever need to open, but if you can’t come up with anything, open your mouth and say hello. She’ll usually say hello back. No need for a magic opener. You’re a foreigner who says hello, so do what you’re supposed to do.

5. Set a single goal – Listen, you’re not going to marry a girl in 5 minutes. And often you’re going to run through dozens or more girls just to get a contact that leads to anything more than a little messaging back and forth. So don’t go in planning your future with this girl. Set yourself a singular goal and it will make the whole task of talking to a girl easier. For instance: I’m going to find out her name. I’m going to see where’s she’s from. I’m going to learn a new kanji. I’m going to see what she thinks of my shoes. Once you accomplish your goal, you are free to leave, you did it. But if you get that far, you’ll probably already be into conversation and on your way.

Warmed up, thrown a few away, now start getting some longer chats, contacts, dates, and more. And write it up on Japan Lair.